Not Funny Insurance Quotes
Search Funny Email
Men Versus Women
The Value of Life Insurance
Jim’s barn burned down. Julie, his wife, called the insurance company and said, “We had that barn insured for fifty thousand and I want my money.” “Whoa there, just a minute, Julie, it doesn’t work like that. We will assess the value of the building and provide you with a new one of comparable worth.”... »
And to conclude Funny Email’s “Lurid Affair Week”
Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside. He looked up and said weakly: "I have something I must confess." »
Steak and Wine for a Nickel
A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer. "Certainly, Sir, that'll be one cent." »
The New Statue
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. “Hurry,” she said, “stand in the corner.” She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. “Don’t move until I tell you,” she said. “Pretend you’re a statue.” “What’s this?” the husband inquired as he entered the... »
In Honor of Someone We All Know and Love
A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day they went to her place and made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM. »
Men do hear better than women….
THE DEAF WIFE A man feared his wife wasn’t hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family doctor to discuss the problem. The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform... »
Men Just Have it Better…
NICKNAMES If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes. EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John... »
The Newlyweds
A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" »
Divorce Jokes
It’s Monday. Let’s get divorced! Actually, that may be happening to me at this very moment, and it really isn’t all that funny. I’ll try not to let all the jokes get bitter: “A rabbi, a priest and a duck went into a bar. The priest beat the duck to death with a spoon.” But... »
Political Correctness Class
Men and women are getting more sensitive these days. Gone are the days when you can simply refer to someone cheap whore and expect them to be happy about it. That's just the way life is. Proper terminology changes. To help ease you into the 21st century in your relationships with the opposite sex,... »