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Funny Emails (general)
Rock Band Joke
Funny Emails: You don’t have to have a lot of rock band experience to enjoy this one. A man walks into a shop. “You got one of them Marshall Hiwatt AC30 amplificatior thingies and a Gobson Strato Blaster geetar with a Fried Rose tremolo? ” “You’re a drummer, aren’t you? ” “Yeah. How’d you know?... »
On the Menu today!
This joke has been rated R. Normally I avoid these, but it is “hump day” after all. A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads: ————————- Cheese Sandwich $ 1.50 Chicken Sandwich $ 2.50 Hand Job $10.00 ————————– Checking his wallet he finds one single ten dollar bill. He walks up to the... »
Yo Mama is so Fat
It’s amazing how many “Yo Mama” jokes I had to sift through just to find a handfull of funny ones…. Yo Mama is so fat they had to install speedbumps at the China Buffett. Yo mama’s so fat she stepped on the scale and my phone number came up. Yo Mama so stupid…she... »
Off-Color Funny Kid In School Joke
There once was a girl named Janice. She went to a Christian school called Grace. One day she didn’t get much sleep so she decided to sleep during sex education. When Mrs. Applebee called on Janice to answer the question “What did Eve say after her and Adam had sex the first time?” Billy, the person behind Janice,... »
Home Health Tips
FE: There is one thing in life that is as certain as death and taxes, and that is that if you recieve an email stating that Snopes.com has been checked and that the following story/information is true, then you can be 100 percent certain that what you are about to read is utter... »
Excerpts from actual letters sent to landlords
Funny Emails: According to the email, these are all true. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is cleared. I want some repairs done to my stove as it has backfires and burnt my knob off. This is to let you know that there is a smell coming from the man... »
TOUR GUIDE TERM …..and the… TRANSLATION
Old world charm ……….. No bath Tropical ……………… Rainy Majestic setting ………. A long way from town Options galore ………… Nothing is included in the itinerary Secluded hideaway ……… Impossible to find or get to Pre-registered rooms …… Already occupied Explore on your own ……. Pay for it yourself Knowledgeable trip hosts .. They’ve flown in an airplane before No extra fees... »
Choose The Manner of Your Death
There were three guys, a Canadian, an Australian and a New Zealander. They were all going to be executed. The executioner said that they would each get to choose the method by which they would die. The choices were: lethal injection, electric chair or firing squad. The Australian was afraid of needles and didn’t want... »
Happy Monday
Mickey Mouse is having a nasty divorce with Minnie Mouse. Mickey spoke to the judge about the separation. “I’m sorry Mickey, but I can’t legally separate you two on the grounds that Minnie is mentally insane…” Mickey replied, “I didn’t say she was mentally insane, I said that she’s fuc!@#@! goofy!” »
Christmas gifts that will finish up that shopping for you…
This Christmas season, do all your funny shopping here at Funny Email. After all, I get paid if you do, and I have two children who want ponies and race cars for Christmas. For the casual drunk, we have these festive beer bottle decoration bands. I can’t really tell what they say, but I imagine... »